Saturday, January 30, 2010

Ramblings from the rabbit hole

So before my official legal divorce I felt this unbearable need to talk, see, and be around Bailey. But since Jan 15 there isn't that need. I mean I miss him and I love him-LOTS. But there isn't a in love my tummy swarms when I see him.

I am angry at him. Angry that HE DID this. Angry that he can just go on while I have to do the day to day of our old life.

I think I am ready to date-I am scared.....How do I date again? How do I be a mother to my children and a lover to another man who is not their father? It is scary. I am scared to share my hopes and dreams with someone again. Last time I got burned. When do I introduce my children to a boyfriend? It is all such new territory!

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